NY Post – Times Square isn’t big enough for the two of them. The Naked Cowboy claims a bawdy, bikini-clad female busker who calls herself “The Naked Cowgirl” is ripping off his shtick, and he’s threatening to lasso her into court for as much as $150,000. The cowboy, whose real name is Robert Burck, sent a cease-and-desist letter to his foil, Sandy Kane, a fixture of the city comedy scene and former stripper famous for closing her act by lighting her breasts on fire. “Your use of Naked Cowgirl is essentially identical to the Naked Cowboy and is clearly in violation” of Burck’s trademark, read the letter. Burck is demanding that Kane — who began appearing in Times Square in a red, white and blue cowboy hat and matching bikini several years ago — either stop making money off of his trademark or sign a “Naked Cowboy Franchise Agreement.” “If she’s going to sell stuff and make money off of it, then, yeah, she’s going to have to pay,” Burck said. Most licensed franchisees are required to fork over $5,000 for a year or $500 a month and go through a screening process to ape the Naked Cowboy’s act. “I’ve been naked for years,” said Kane, who hosted a raunchy public-access comedy program called the “Sandy Kane Blew Show” for more than a decade. “You know how much money I make? Two dollars a picture. I’m not selling any products.”
Hey I got an idea. How about you take your lazy deadbeat ass to the store, buy some pants, and go on a fucking job interview? And ugly bitch how about you take your wrinkles and smoker’s lung and go kill yourself in a dark alley in Queens or something? Fucking shit is a joke. Bogging the courts down with lawsuits and cease and desists and legalese documents over who can be a naked street performer. Enough. Just die. Times Square will replace you in 2 seconds with the next spawn of Satan. But you know what? As a matter of fact if I were the Naked Cowboy I’d be fucking pissed off too now that I think about it. Like this is this guy’s whole gimmick. Naked Cowboy. Simple. Been doing it for years. Then some bitch moves in on the exact same spot on the exact same block as who? Naked Cowgirl. Fucked up. So I guess if I gave any sort of shit whatsoever I’d side with the dickhead in the tight white underpants.
Wait she lights her tits on fire? For real? Ok fuck you Naked Cowboy get off the streets.
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